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  • Jaye Gaff

An Unprofessional Woman

Updated: Aug 29, 2022



I was recently called the most unprofessional person someone had ever worked with. This person was quite up there in age — which I only say to point out that they’ve lived a heck of a long time — and said this very statement in an email that included my boss.


And, guess what?


I, truly honestly, had never felt more proud of myself.


I could go into an explanation of why I know that’s not true. I could explain what my boss said to me in reaction to this. I could tell you about all the grand things I am. But I’m not going to do any of that and here’s why —


I just don’t give a shit.


If me creating a boundary makes me unprofessional then I’m really fucking happy to be unprofessional.


Now, there was a time in my life where I would have crumbled over something like this but that’s not me anymore. I have being abused at work to thank for that. And, no, I’m not trying to go all Sansa Stark and act like I’m glad it happened because I’m not. I wish I could go back and not allow any of that to happen but it did. I can’t change it. But what I can change is how I react to these situations.


I invite you to be proud of being unprofessional when it comes from someone whose opinion doesn’t count. I usually label every idiot with “old white man” because old white men, I have found, are the main culprits of shitdom. Of course, anyone can be shit but, really, in the last 10 years, I have encountered so many privileged white men who have no fucking idea just how much they get in this world for no other reason than they are white men.


So, sure, I could have cried. I could have responded to that email in a useless attempt at trying to prove him wrong but, really, such things are an utter waste of time. We could have gotten into one of my favourite hobbies — a deliciously petty back and forth. But why waste your breath? You will never change the mind of an idiot. Or… you may be able to change their mind and prove your worth but why should you have to?


I’ve stopped doing someone else’s dirty work. I have stopped trying to defend myself to people that don’t matter. In this I have found a fabulous zest for life and it’s a zest that can only come from not giving a fuck.


It’s wonderful.

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