Why used to be my favourite question to ask. I was always trying to find a reason for everything but maturity and time have allowed me to see that why? isn’t something I need or care to know.
You can spend your whole life asking why and never get closer to an answer.
Why didn’t my parents love me in the way I needed?
Why was I abused at work?
Why did stress cause my jaw bones to fuck up?
Why does my Husband do stupid things?
The same could be said for what if? as well. There’s no use to any of it and, really, you don’t need to know why. It doesn’t matter. And would an answer make any of it better?
I’ve learned to stop asking why. To stop thinking what if. Because the answers are often not ones you want or need to hear. And, sometimes, or, really, most of the time there is no answer. There is no reason. And there doesn’t have to be. It is what it is. Things are sometimes that way for no reason at all. And that’s okay.
If you can practise not caring and not needing an answer I think you can start living a really wonderful life. It takes time. It takes training. It takes patience and perseverance. But getting there is the best thing. Not only for yourself but also for the people around you. And if you can’t do it for yourself do it for the people who love you. And once you get there, to enlightenment or whatever the fuck it is, there truly is no looking back.