misadventures in parenting//i don't believe in babysitters

Sometimes I feel like the dumbest parent in the entire world. Defective. Case in point -- I don't believe in babysitters. I know they exist. I know having friends or family "babysit" is also a thing but I just refuse to believe. Here's why --

1. I have seriously never come to the point where I needed one. I may be slightly {overly} attached to B. but, look, she's fun and I love going out for dinner with her. Husband ain't that interesting.
2. I have seen babysitters get drunk while their full attention is supposed to be on the child. This shit happens and it ain't happening anywhere near B.
3. I have insane trust issues. I barely trust my Husband {he knows this}. Why would I trust anyone else?
4. People are too interested in their phones to properly watch my kid and if she were to be watched by someone they would need to give her the same amount of attention as I do. They're also not allowed to drink, smoke or take drugs while doing so even if she's asleep. They are to cook her proper meals. See? I'm insane.
5. Babysitters get stalked and murdered. Fictional movies tell me this is true.

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