3/03/2016

help me//i'm addicted to stickers

I am the adult who never quite outgrew being a kid. I still love all the things I loved back then but I think I love them more now. It might be because my childhood kind of sucked and I'm grasping at straws. It might be because I was dropped on the head a lot as a baby. Or maybe that combined with the fact that my mother probably drank heavily throughout her pregnancy with me? I mean, maybe I'm a bit... you know. Or maybe I'm just bloody awesome? Who knows. All I do know is that I have a problem. I'm addicted to stickers.

Stickers. I'll let that sink in a bit more. For my planner and other planning needs. Stickers. And no Officeworks lady I'm not a teacher! I'm just spending two hundred dollars on stickers for myself okay! Can I live?


But seriously...

How many stickers can one have? This many, apparently. Should I mention that this is an actual mound? Like, there's stickers underneath the ones on top. I have taco stickers and ice cream stickers and monster stickers and it's still not enough dammit.

Also, sticker books. So many sticker books...

I do have regular intercourse. But I understand the confusion.

& then...

I have filed my stickers. I sigh and roll my eyes at myself don't you worry. But, also, this is a section of the accordion file. It is not the whole damn thing! There's sections for food stickers and animal stickers and cute label stickers and what the flipping heck?

The issue, of course, lies in the fact that I genuinely believe that I don't have enough stickers. I am also fiercely protective of my stash and nobody else is allowed to touch them without my express permission. But, also, sometimes I catch myself saying to Husband "when we eat Mexican you can use one of my taco stickers for your planner" as if taco stickers are the world's greatest gift. Also, Husband has a planner to actually remember shit because he has the worst memory but, me, well I have a great one and I remember stupid details from seventy billion years ago like what underwear I wore when Husband and I first had sex {a.k.a when I vomited all over his room and he put me in the shower and didn't cop a feel}.

So, in conclusion, I need to go to sticker-holics anonymous. Yes?

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